Unemployment Journal: What Large Shapes Can You Squeeze into Your Mouth? (EBitch's Continuing Narrative on Being Broke and Unemployed)
Posted Sat Jan 20 01:55:26 2001 by ebitch |
By ebitch
tonight, i am experimenting with triangles. big, greasy triangles of corn. i'm eating burritos, chips, salsa. i feel my stomach starting to protrude (i have to go to the gym tomorrow). i was doing so well the first few days, now i'm a hardcore isolator, listening to radiohead, eating bricks of _cheap_ sharp cheddar cheese, swigging orange juice out of the carton. ugh. it's so not cool. i watered one of my plants today, only because it was literally _fainting_. and my cats are cute, but they are getting on my nerves, fighting to manipulate me into feeding them (again).
i belong to a discussion group for people with pets. i had to introduce my animals, and they were welcomed. the other day when cat number 1 had a noticeable mood change, i posted and got some ten-dollar advice. i think he is afraid he will not get enough food or love, for he knows i am unemployed. he is remembering the times i took rolls of pennies to the crappy grocery store to buy them cat food. i could barely afford a latte then.
tuesday
today, i was forced to give up my valuable nynma membership by the office manager of the company i used to work for. i was told by the membership people that memberships were not transferable, but after a brief three-way phone call, followed by an email, the membership was transferred to the ceo. that is interesting, isn't it? i pleaded for a discount on a new membership for myself, and they agreed. i don't know why i felt so compelled to have a membership, it's just one of those things. you never know when it might be useful. they had a lot of cheese at the christmas party, and i got an etch-a-sketch which i gave to my friend's friend robin who was recovering from a break-up last month.
this is my third week of unemployment. so much has happened. i need to get a hair cut, some color, a lip wax, a manicure. i've even thought of getting my legs waxed. i did that several years ago and it was painful! my friend alison told me that before she goes to l.a. she usually gets a 'porn star' body wax, meaning full body, head to toe. i'm mainly interested in the bikini area to the ankles but put it off because i'm so sensitive during my menses.
buying menstrual products is anxiety-producing. they are expensive! i was thinking about how many periods i'm going to have over the next ten years, and was imagining the numbers of boxes of tampons, packages of pads, bottles of motrin, or really the generic motrin, i would be consuming. it's not fair. i showed my 'vinnie's tampon case' to my grandmother and she didn't get it.
i should have brought an egg roll to my grandmother, but i didn't. she can't really eat that stuff although she does anyway, my sister reports.
my grandmother rocks, truly, but she's getting old and a little nutty. she can no longer tell the difference between true mail and junk mail, and freaks out at every single piece of mail in her mailbox. my mother has to go over there and look at her mail and throw most of it out. i saw a book about ralph nader on her shelf.
tuesday night
my second-to-last paycheck came last friday. i'm not that nervous, although some of the other poor souls who were laid off have begun some temporary projects.
later on that night
went out with four lawyers, a restaurateur and a club bouncer for sushi, but i had already eaten earlier so i had tea and edamame. i was most upset when i requested salt and received vulgar table salt, not sea or kosher salt. that's a nice snack, edamame and tea. this is a possible alternative to the afternoon latte.
wednesday
i'm listening to radiohead, kid a. i like it. i don't know what all the fuss is about, i think it rocks. maybe this is because i grew up loving progressive rock, music that was more compositional and serious. i have the patience to explore this new geography with radiohead, especially after catching up by obsessively listening to ok computer and the bends for weeks.
you see, i just recently discovered radiohead. i got kid a and knew i had to prepare properly for it. so i did. i still need pablo honey, but the bends really helped. it's an incredible cd, the bends. so is ok computer. i can remember everyone listening to it a few years ago when i was in one of my snotty jazz phases, only listening to serious jazz. now i'm catching up with the "alt" music i missed.
i'm thinking it might be time to not work in music anymore. when i have a job in music, i wind up so busy i never listen to music. that's the thing about taking a much-loved hobby and turning it into a job: it loses some of its sexiness. i'd like to put the sexiness back into my music, thank you very much.
i spent a ton of money at the drug store today. why?
well, i needed a few things. i'll admit i bought a few things i didn't completely need, but thought i should have them.
when i get home from the drug store, i like to arrange my purchases on the table neatly and admire them. then, each and every item is removed from its box and put away.
i was in there for a really long time. i went in there to buy a tweezer and left with sixty dollars' worth of stuff, including cvs clear plastic wrap. i have a thing for generics. i feel thrifty when i buy them. some products i won't buy the generic version, some of the more serious products such as tampons. this is brand loyalty. or maybe i'm just not willing to take risks on my vagina.
here's what i got, not including the wrap, since i mentioned that already:
two (2) large tubes toms of maine peppermint toothpaste: one for the sink, one for the shower. don't you have two dental stations in your bathroom? i like to brush my teeth while the conditioner is in my hair. they were on sale.
three (3) rolls cvs bathroom tissue, 'made with no added perfumes.'
one (1) tube cvs maximum strength, triple antibiotic ointment plus pain relief. good colors: burgundy and almost-orange. for external use only.
one (1) gillette for women sensor excel razor with soft, no slip grip ('manche doux, antideperant' for french-speaking shoppers), now with botanical oils! this is a first for me. in the entire history of my personal shaving activities, i have never purchased a product exclusively designed for and marketed to women. because i'm expermenting with my more feminine side these days, i thought i would see what it was like to shave with a feminine product: would i feel more like a woman?
one (1) super precision tip trim professional quality deluxe tweezers with slant tips that tweeze even the smallest hairs. fantastic! according to the package, this instrument has the 'finest precision edge available.'
one (1) pair trim quality italian mustache/beard scissors, satisfaction guaranteed. these are for my eyebrows, which require more work than i care to provide. the little comb is very cute. want it?
one (1) pink box johnson johnson barbie brand band-aid adhesive bandages. count: 25 sterile assorted sizes.
one (1) dispenser containing one hundred yards of cvs waxed dental tape, not floss, promising 'healthier gums' and 'cleaner, fresher breath' as well as a helpful diagram. i'm comforted by the appearance of the sign of the ada (american dental association).
one (1) upright, blue, space-age style bottle of fa 'spirit of freshness' moisture rich body was containing moisturizers that feed the body' and 'exotic fregrances that fuel the sense.' not only does it bear the good housekeeping promises seal, but goes on to describe its exotic fragrance as a 'medley,' one of my least favorite words next to 'gift,' 'treat,' and 'cornucopia,' and expresses this joyful quality in units of 'notes.' hallelujah, that.
i could not resist a certain implement, a sort of medievalish skin device meant to access blackhead. for only 2.99, it looked like a lot of fun. it was worthless. i threw it out.
later that day
therapy was very good. i noticed my therapist wearing a ring with a big, fat ruby in the middle i pointed to it, as if it was on my finger, in the middle of a sentence about something work-related i'm sure, and she let me see it. i learned she got it for herself when she married herself. i figured it was something like that. that's so cool. i've been thinking of marrying myself, but i can't afford the ring i want.
on my way out i saw her next incoming patient, a whiny, temperamental chick with short dark hair. i know she hates me. and she should. i hate her.
why do i hate her, this woman whose name i do not even know?
new book: the seven habits of effective people, by stephen r. covey. personal victories preceed public. no kidding. realize the leader of my last dot-com has a deeply flawed character, attention-deficit disorder (untreated) and possibly criminal tendencies. hard to separate his acts of desparation from his underlying character.
decide to dedicate myself to becoming a very effective person.
took an informal poll of netslaves, asking what netslave guys wanted for valentines day. was shocked at the cuddly, touchy-feely nature of the responses i got. puh-lease! only one slave, a gentlemen i had the pleasure of cuffing to my radiator for forty-eight hours, was honest about wanting a bluejab from his sweetie. thank you, tobes!
here is a list of what netslave guys said they wanted for valentine's day:
-dinner at a nice restaurant
-'as long as she loves me, she could buy me a card and nothing else, and it would be cool.'
-sex
-'i like to stick with the classics for valentine's day.
romantic dinner, flowers, shopping spree at the local
love craft adult emporium.'
-anime dvds
-chocolates
-pa wines
-'maybe something tasteful from victoria's secret'
-1996 RX-7 with the touring package
-'some help working on my sailboat, and maybe a
simple gadget or two for it (mast tabernacle, additional
blocks to lead halyards aft to cockpit, that sort of thing)'
-some 'excellent cuddling'
-nice day, dinner etc.
-blue jab
-her and her best friend
-another cat carrier.
-'a woman who dressed like it was 1927, if only for a
day.'
-NHL
-DVD player
-PS2
-High-end pair of headphones
-21" (frame) Trek or Schwinn hybrid bike
-A Sabres package would be fun in that context.
-fellatio from my mrs.
-good old fashioned handjob
-straight sex after lengthy foreplay
isn't this nice?
for valentine's day, i want the person i adore to invite me over and remove my watch.
just now i realized that if you cut a cube of cheese, you can press a pretzel nugget into it, thereby making a sort of compact hors d'oeuvre.
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Name: ebitch
Email: ebitch@servemyass.com
Date: Thu Jan 25 05:10:50 2001
Comment: mr. agasi, i already know about your underwear.
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Name: Amarand Agasi
Email: amarand@amarand.org
Date: Wed Jan 24 18:20:24 2001
Comment: I'm under a court order for full disclosure of my underwear per SEC due diligence filing regulations. I could tell you, but then you'd have to buy me!
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Name: ebitch
Email: ebitch@servemyass.com
Date: Wed Jan 24 17:56:23 2001
Comment: bill, guys who don't wear underwear have to wash their jeans more often. remind me to tell you the story about underwear night.
masterpro, my cousin will never ask that because she is too busy negotiating her second divorce. but i don't do much cooking with my underwear, cheesecloth is much better for straining delicate sauces, i find.
i would be delighted to have lunch with you.
i look forward to learning more about your underwear.
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Name: MasterPo
Email:
Date: Wed Jan 24 13:52:57 2001
Comment:
e - And when she asks what you cook with your underwear how will you answer? :-)
My company is moving down town shortly. Maybe we can meet up for a lunch time tour of the tunnels. Remind me to bring hip boots and canary.
As to my undergarments, I could tell you but I'm under court not to discuss those things in public. :->>
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Name: ebitch
Email: ebitch@servemyass.com
Date: Wed Jan 24 10:43:59 2001
Comment: ok master, i hear you. my cultural landscape is different than most other people's. we can agree to disagree, although we probably agree, but we're not hearing each other. i think this is the beginning of a wonderful relationship though.
now, about your undies.
are you a calvin klein man, then? the button-up kind? i love that.
i realize that i've also made a gender assumption as well. i think you're a guy. or rather i feel guy vibes from you. but i could be wrong.
regarding underwear again, my cousin once gave me a frying pan. i'm not interested in receiving low-quality cookware as a rule, i prefer all-clad master chef wares, which this was not. so i exchanged it (at macy's) for a bunch of underwear. i hope she comes over one day and wonders where her frying pan is. i will unbutton my pants and show her.
xo
e
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Name: MasterPo
Email:
Date: Wed Jan 24 09:37:06 2001
Comment:
e - Your manhole/subway adventure sounds like a great time! Really. Maybe you could offer tours the way they do in France of the Paris catacombs?
My point simply was that NYC (specifically Manhattan) has much to offer in the way of diversions, whatever floats your boat. But if you're not taking the fullest advantage of them then IMO you're just paying a lot of taxes and higher prices, and dealing with greater bullsh-t while not getting much in turn.
ps- As to my choice of undies, when I run for President you can ask me. :->
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Name: Amarand Agasi
Email: amarand@amarand.org
Date: Wed Jan 24 08:08:47 2001
Comment: You see, Bill? You'd never get this great discourse over at The Onion! :)
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Name: bill
Email: bill@netslaves.com
Date: Wed Jan 24 03:11:29 2001
Comment: e, what's your take on guys who don't wear underwear? (not that I've ever done such a thing.)
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Name: ebitch
Email: ebitch@servemyass.com
Date: Wed Jan 24 01:03:30 2001
Comment: a, i have a feeling you are a tighty-whities guy. mr. masterpro, i have a feeling, either wears boxers or possibly a leather g-string.
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Name: Amarand Agasi
Email: amarand@amarand.org
Date: Tue Jan 23 18:24:12 2001
Comment: What if he wears tighty-whities? That's his right to choose, though, right?
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Name: ebitch
Email: ebitch@servemyass.com
Date: Tue Jan 23 17:10:17 2001
Comment: masterpro, you are beginning to annoy me. what is considered to be a 'cultural' event to one may not translate well for another. i had the pleasure of climbing down a manhole on atlantic avenue to see a lost train tunnel with about fifty other subway fanatics this past fall. there are more lebanese and syrians in my neighborhood than in some parts of the middle east, providing amazing shopping, dining and observing opportunities. as well, how one defines 'night life' is relative. my nights are full of life. how are yours? now stop your juvenile judgmental attitude and lemme see your boxer shorts.
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Name: Amarand Agasi
Email: amarand@amarand.org
Date: Tue Jan 23 07:31:45 2001
Comment: When they have the monthly downtime, it's always on the weekend, and it's always early...something about timezones and Austrailia needing to do payroll at certain times. Who knows? But it only happens one weekend (a single day) a month, and I currently get paid overtime for it so...no big deal! I usually take time off during the week to compensate for it anyway.
Also, unless you're a late worker, you can only see that type of thing really early.
I prefer not being in the office at all, regardless of the time of day! :)
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Name: twisted sistah
Email: bitemybeaver@hotmail.com
Date: Mon Jan 22 22:10:36 2001
Comment:
In response to Overwhelming Demand...
The Inaugural Edition of Twisted Sistah's Freelancer/Unemployed Person's Guide to Cooking
Our first yummy recipe...pink slip living gotcha down? Can't even afford to eat at that disgusting greasy cheap hole in the wall next door to where you used to work, you know, the one you swore you'd never go back to but now you wish you COULD go back to? Fear not! TS has the answer...
Rubber Glove Chili!
Serves 1, good for 1-4 dinners depending on your finances and what you pack it down with (see below)
Ingredients:
-1 large onion, diced
-1/4 lb. low-grade ground beef
-All-purpose seasoning to match ethnic preferences, or whatever the last tenant of your shoebox apartment left in the spice cabinet/fridge...ketchup works also
-Starch of some sort (leftover cooked rice, bread, ramen noodles, etc)
-Rubber Glove (condoms work also)(note, if using condoms, do NOT use the minty kind unless it matches the seasonings chosen above)
Directions:
Dice onion and fry it down. If you don't have a stove, nuke it in your serving dish. Add meat and do the same. If you have absolutely no cooking facilities in your hole in the sky then use a lighter and/or start a small campfire in the middle of your kitchen/sidewalk/whatever with your old copies of Red Herring or the Industry Standard and cook over THAT. Dice latex of your choice and add seasoning. When it starts to smell cooked enough to not kill you, stir in the rubber glove and take it off the heat. Allow to cool to just above room/body temperature.
Dump your yummy, authentic, tastes-just-like-bad-ChinaMex-place-with-a-23-year-old-inspection-notice chili on the starch of your choice! Chew REAL HARD! ENJOY!
Note: For a real authentic experience, don't even use beef! Use, um, local fauna...check behind your local bodega...you can probably score a semi-acceptable onion from the dumpster while you're looking for your Meat Substitute!
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Name: bill
Email: bill_lessard@hotmail.com
Date: Mon Jan 22 21:54:51 2001
Comment: Amarand,
If you don't mind my asking... What the HECK are you doing at work so early?
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Name: Amarand Agasi
Email: amarand@amarand.org
Date: Mon Jan 22 16:02:49 2001
Comment: You know, when I come into work at 3 in the morning and I look out over Columbus, Ohio it's a really nice sight. I am sure that it's nothing compared to NYC but.... Thousands of points of light here are pretty similar to hundreds of thousands of points of light there, methinks. And they're WAY cheaper. :)
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Name: MasterPo
Email:
Date: Mon Jan 22 15:36:15 2001
Comment:
IMO if one lives in any of the 5 boroughs (especially Manhattan) and you aren't taking full advantage of the night life or cultual activities then there's little reason to stay in NYC.
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Name: ebitch
Email: ebitch@servemyass.com
Date: Mon Jan 22 15:19:37 2001
Comment: om namah shivaya, master po.
i care not for the new york night life. as for the 'culture stuff,' i'm not sure i know what that means. i don't go to the ballet or opera or shows...i like music events and fine dining. i also like public transportation and the view of manhattan coming over the 59th street bridge gives me a big woodie (and i'm not even a guy!). you should try brooklyn. it's better.
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Name: bill
Email: bill@netslaves.com
Date: Mon Jan 22 15:19:28 2001
Comment: Po,
I've got a love/hate relationship with NYC. Hate the hype and the phony bastards from North Dakota who come here to be superstars. Love the culture and when I'm away from it for too long, I begin to get sick.
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Name: MasterPo
Email:
Date: Mon Jan 22 09:46:47 2001
Comment:
Amarand is correct in that NYC is the MOST expensive city in the country to live. Frankly, if you're not into the night life or culture stuff there's little reason to stay here.
I've worked out NY and it's a different world. Mostly better.
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Name: Amarand Agasi
Email: amarand@amarand.org
Date: Mon Jan 22 06:30:41 2001
Comment: Buy, buy, buy! It's the American Way! And just in case you don't have enough "Spirit" to buy all the time, we'll just make some artificial holidays to make your FRIENDS compel you to purchase things.
I do think it's cool, however, that St. Valentino fell in love with his jailor's daughter.
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Name: bill
Email: bill@netslaves.com
Date: Sun Jan 21 23:23:16 2001
Comment: Re: nervous about Valentine's Day. Oh, shit. Just when we've recovered from the holidays, here's another one to torture us.
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Name: ebitch
Email: ebitch@servemyass.com
Date: Sun Jan 21 23:07:48 2001
Comment: now i'm worrying about valentines day.
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Name: bill
Email: bill@netslaves.com
Date: Sun Jan 21 22:17:53 2001
Comment: Amarand,
Yeah, we've got a real conspiracy going on here. Please excuse me while I get back to scheming.:)
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Name: Amarand Agasi
Email: amarand@amarand.org
Date: Sun Jan 21 13:43:22 2001
Comment: I just think it's fun thinking about Bill and Steve behind The Conspiracy!
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Name: ebitch
Email: ebitch@servemyass.com
Date: Sun Jan 21 12:31:31 2001
Comment: amarand, i like what you said about punctuation. i've been experimenting with the exclamation point (!) lately. for the longest time i didn't use them, no matter what. now, i'm finding them quite satisfying in certain spots.
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Name: Amarand Agasi
Email: amarand@amarand.org
Date: Sun Jan 21 10:11:14 2001
Comment: This site also kills dollar signs ().
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Name: Amarand Agasi
Email: amarand@amarand.org
Date: Sun Jan 21 10:09:38 2001
Comment: See, Steve? That semi-colon that I know I put there inbetween the parenthesis is gone. Ha! :) Do you and Bill sit there all day and say "Nope...we can't let THAT semi-colon through. Reject it!"? Actually, that's a pretty funny image...you and Bill sitting around all day censoring semi-colon usage. :) A big GREEN button marked with a check-mark (and the associated ping sound), and a big RED button marked with an "X" (with the buzzer sound). I can imagine that would be quite entertaining work!
The Anti-Semi-Colon Consortium
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Name: Amarand Agasi
Email: amarand@amarand.org
Date: Sun Jan 21 10:05:28 2001
Comment: I think that the engine that runs Netslaves gets rid of certain punctuation when it's feeling in the right mood. For instance, semi-colons () sometimes disappear. Also, I love using the apostrophy (') and I've seen those go away here too. :) Then again, I've also seen dashes (-) slip off the page at random moments as well. It's strange....
Twisted: I've often thought that I should start my own consulting or recruiting firm, because my friends don't go jobless for long. I take their resumes and make them look nicer put people in for jobs that I know they'll like (once I get to know them), and give hints, tips and tricks from the tons of interviews I've gone on and read about. I guess I just like helping people. I think that writing a journal about your time-off can help a lot, because it shows you the past, and then you can learn from it.
One thing I told my best friend, who just moved to Manhattan, is that New York City has to be one of the most unforgiving of people who are jobless. Things just seem more expensive there. If I were to lose my job in Columbus, for instance, I would be able to afford my 500 a month rent working just about anywhere at any wage.... In New York City, rent and food is so expensive that you just about have to have a great job in order to make ends meet. Correct me if I'm wrong, but this does not sound like a positive, long-term type of situation unless you're a power broker on Wall Street making decent money. I mean, I know people are going to say "Hey, New York's a GREAT place to live..." because that's what I hear all the time, but with rent so high in the nice areas, and the not-so-nice areas having their problems, it doesn't sound like a "great place to live" to me. I have a two-bedroom, brand-new apartment with plenty of space with a 5-acre lake, walking path, etc. How much would 500 get you in NYC?
I know everyone here who lives in NYC is going to hate me for this...but I guess I should ask the question: "Why not move?" Just pick up all of your stuff, and move to a place where the economy is more friendly?
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Name: twisted sistah
Email: bitemybeaver@hotmail.com
Date: Sat Jan 20 21:48:51 2001
Comment:
ebitch,
Let's touchbase offlist...in the meantime...RE the glove...belive it or not that's not the first time I got a piece of glove in my food...I was at one of those China-Mex places in Chelsea getting my 1.50 burrito when I got a piece of gristle I just couldn't chew...yep it was a glove fingertip...wonder if the rest of the finger was in the chili...
These days I am so busy I just try to stay healthy by eating organic yogurt with honey and dried fruit in it keep fresh stuff around the house as opposed to deadly snaxcrap, etc...I nuke an organic veggie burrito (surprisingly cheap) between chapters...
normally though I am the queen of rice dishes and one-pot cooking...and I also like the stuff in the Moosewood cookbooks...I'm not a vegetarian but a lot of their casseroley stuff takes care of cooking for the week and is pretty good....
Rock on! I gotta get back to work....
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Name: Crumb
Email: firewallfright@lycos.com
Date: Sat Jan 20 21:32:56 2001
Comment: I envy you, ebitch. For a time, unemployment frightened me. I was secure in the egotistic belief that, if I actually was invited to go in to interview for a job, I could get that job. My downfall has been that I never took time for self-assessment and now realize that there are numerous things more frightening to me than unemployment (taking the wrong job just because it is there is now at the top of my list, and I presently abide in that hell of my own making). I wish I had your balls, ebitch. Rock on
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Name: ebitch
Email: ebitch@servemyass.com
Date: Sat Jan 20 19:28:34 2001
Comment: geoff, you're my hero .
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Name: Geoff Depew
Email: mephron@earthlink.net
Date: Sat Jan 20 18:59:34 2001
Comment: Apparently someone doesn't seem to realize that if you're doing some kind of personal journal, your personal methods of doing things are part of it. Which means that hey, if you don't want to capitalize things, you don't have to. And if you want to tell someone to take their style guides, polish them up nicely, turn them sideways, and stick them up their ass so far it wedges in the appendix, hey, that's your right!
So, for anyone that wishes to comment on my grammar, my spelling, my tendencies on capitalization, I'd like to say one thing:
Bite my wide-load pale white ass, smeg-brain.
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Name: ebitch
Email: ebitch@servemyass.com
Date: Sat Jan 20 18:04:09 2001
Comment: dear twisted sarah,
rock on! so good to meet you. i hear you about the yuppie cooking thing. what do you like to cook?
i would write to that deli and complain about the rubber glove. want me to help with that? i would also alert the department of health.
e
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Name: ebitch
Email: ebitch@servemyass.com
Date: Sat Jan 20 18:00:43 2001
Comment: Dear Paul,
In your honor I have assumed the nifty new capitalization feature you were so kind to introduce. You see, I never read Cummings, and only recently learned that he liked writing in all lower case. I'm so glad you focused on the kind of letters I used, because that's important to me, too. We have a lot in common, I think. By the way, I would like to suggest a newish device for your review, to be added to your phrase, "...reassessment of ones values[,]" that will show possession thus it would read, "...reassessment of one's values," values belonging to one. I have a feeling this is included in the Yale Style Guide, near the section on why rendering words in all caps is bad.
Your assessment of my character flatters. You took the time to really take in my words. I feel we are connected in a special way, almost intimate, but compelling nonetheless. Your need to seek things of substance is inspiring and makes me want to say to you Om Namah Shivaya, or The Divine in me honors the Divine in you. Really.
What you said about my therapist marrying herself makes me wonder why marrying oneself is any more perverted than making love to oneself. Do you ever make love to yourself, or even just have sex with yourself? Personally, I support self-love in any form. I love you, Paul, even though you said mean-spirited, judgmental, harsh things about me. I'm envisioning you as a small child even though you think i'm gauche and cast doubt upon my worth and employability. Love, ebitch
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Name: Paul
Email: winopaul@yahoo.com
Date: Sat Jan 20 17:02:25 2001
Comment: You might find yourself more employable if you use this nifty new communication aid called capitalization. It came in ohh, 'bout a coupla thousand years ago and has been really catching on lately. You may think it chic to not capitalize but it is really quite gauche. e. e. cummings is so 20th century. And please, don't go the other way and capitalize everything. See the Yale Style Guide for why this is just as bad.
One other thing: a person who thinks they can marry themselves needs help. A shrink who thinks she can marry herself needs to be institutionalized. Also, I am worried about your cats. It seems latte and therapy comes before their food. Unemployment is a great time for reassessment of ones values. My startup just ran out of money and I look forward to a week or two of serious contemplation. Not contemplation of my shopping or gift lists, but of things of substance. I encourage you to assess who you are, who you want to be and the practicalities of how to get there. Employers can sense desperation and panic and you will just end up with another job that fizzles out in a year. Otherwise keep the faith because you do sound like a really nifty person and good things should come your way.
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Name: twisted sistah
Email: bitemybeaver@hotmail.com
Date: Sat Jan 20 15:05:37 2001
Comment: Ebitch you are my new heroine....
Me, right now I'm slaving away on a consulting gig that I never no how no way would have taken if I wasn't so fecking desparate for the money after entering the realm of the unemployed right before Haloweeen...actually RIGHT RIGHT now I have on "Epiphamy: The Best of Chaka Kahn" and I'm ligting every stick of Nag Champa that I have left to drown out the horrible smell of the yuppies' next door attempt at "cooking". For those buttheads, cooking at home is slumming it. Luckilly I know how to cook for real, better. It means that I no longer have to suffer indignities like the piece of rubber glove that I got in my cold-cut sandwich from the corner deli yesterday...but I digress....
People forget that unemployment can be a full time job.
Bless you!
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Name: bill
Email: bill@netslaves.com
Date: Sat Jan 20 15:01:24 2001
Comment: What?! No Ricki?
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